is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I need to stop coming to work sober
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
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