I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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