so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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