I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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