Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
