These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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