I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Randomize
