belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
