You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
i just had sex bonerless
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
