every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
