Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Randomize
