Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize