I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
