Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
