i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
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