I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
