i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
