I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
