A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
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