Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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