I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
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