plz talk dirty to me
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Randomize
