he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Randomize
