I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
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