Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
