All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Randomize
