Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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