"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
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