the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
