so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize
