It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
