We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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