wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Randomize
