It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
