is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
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