i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize
