I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
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