I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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