Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Please, let me fuck your mom
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Randomize
