is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
areolas are like halos for boobs.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
