the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
