Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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