I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
