marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
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