Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
