I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
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