careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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