she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Randomize