You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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