So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
fuck your aforementioned shoe
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
this hospital has no fireball
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize
